


The King's Snake

by theblackangel07



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 07:22:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18048122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theblackangel07/pseuds/theblackangel07
Summary: Roman is convinced by the others to get a pet after moving out. He ends up buying a unique snake from a strange pet store. Odd things start happening around his apartment, and he swears the snake can understand him at times.





	The King's Snake

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [this concept](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/463253) by lostonehero. 



> Initially, I saw this concept and started getting funny ideas for it and joked about writing it. Then I actually did want to write it, but considering it wasn't mine, I wasn't planning to unless the poster gave me the go-ahead. Turns out they wanted to see me write it as much as everyone else, so here we are! I don't plan to change much aside from minor details; this'll just be expanding that idea to a full story.  
> I hope you all like it!

“Oh my god, just get a pet already,” Virgil murmured before sipping his green tea. Roman’s incessant calling at all hours of the day had broken his sleep schedule, and since he didn’t like coffee, tea was his go to.

Roman glared in shock and offense at Virgil’s interruption. He rose a hand to his chest, silent for a moment. “Excuse me?”

Virgil set his cup back down on the cafe table. “Roman, you’ve been desperate for attention ever since you moved out. You  _ clearly _ can’t stand being alone.” He took another sip.

Roman dramatically flipped his hands up as if surrendering. “Well  _ excuse me _ for not having someone to go home to like you and Logan. Or get as much enjoyment out of books and gardening like Patton. I for one prefer to have guests over an empty apartment.”

“Yeah,” Virgil murmured. “That’s why I said get a pet.” When Roman couldn’t think of a come back, Virgil continued. “So that you have someone or something to accompany you every time you get home and you can bother  _ them _ and not  _ us _ and they won’t  _ mind _ nearly as much.” 

“Are you saying I’m nothing but a bother to you?”

Virgil brushed his face in one hand. “No, I mean-yes?” Then he sighed and dropped his hand onto the table. Being truthful and gentle wasn’t his thing. “Roman, you’re a close friend. But you’ve been bothering us so much it’s exhausting. We need a little time to ourselves.”

The dramatic prince huffed in irritation. Virgil meant well, but it still stung his pride. He’d need a day away from Virge to recover. “Fine, fine. I’ll  _ think _ about it.”

*

“-And then he told me I bother everyone too much and should get a pet to take care of instead!”  Roman threw his hands up. They immediately fell back to his side as the fire left him. “And yet I’m starting to think it might be a good idea.” A dog passed by, pausing to look back and sniff one of his hands. 

Patton looked up from rubbing the cheeks of a fluffy, well-trained husky. “Do you  _ want _ a pet?”

The prince let out an unsure whine. Did he? He had to think about it. “Well, I don’t know, I just want someone to be with after a day of acting.” And then he frantically added, “And to admire me, of course.”

“Well,” Patton stood up so he could talk without a dog licking his face, “a pet would certainly love seeing you after a day. And you like being the prince, right? Maybe a pet could be your uh,” Patton had to stop and think. He was great with dogs, bunnies, and plants, but he didn’t know nearly as much about medieval culture as Roman did. “It could be the lord in your royal castle.” Not a good analogy, but Roman appreciated it.

“Good point,” the actor murmured back, tapping his chin. Then he put that hand on his hip and held the other up. “But no pet of mine would be treated with any less fanciful care than I in my own place.”

Patton giggled at that declaration. “Sounds like your mind’s made up.”

He paused. Patton was right, he really did feel like getting a pet now that he thought about it. “Yes,” he said, regaining his composure. “Starting today, the great ‘ _ prince _ ’ Roman is going to look into getting a pet.”

“Good to hear!” One of the smaller dog’s barks got Patton to kneel down again. “Ring me up if you end up wanting one of these fellas!” The dog’s licking pulled his glasses off his face. He caught them with a swift hand and fixed them back on his nose. “Oh, you should let Logan and Virgil know, too! They’ll probably wanna know how it goes.”

*

It was the next day after work when Roman got the chance to stop by a pet place. Patton’s invitation was sweet, but Roman wouldn’t settle for just any pet. No, an actor of his standards would settle for nothing less than exotic. But not too exotic or too cheap, of course. A night of research for exotic pet stores around had turned up laws on what needed a license and many warnings on what was and wasn’t good first time pet material. And as much as Roman wanted something out of this world, he knew in the back of his mind it wouldn’t be fair to him or the animal to get something so exotic that he couldn’t take care of its needs.

The place he’d found was about a forty minute drive from his apartment. According to their website, they sold pets from all around the world, including lizards, tarantulas, ants, and “other strange things”. When he drove up, he saw why he hadn’t noticed it before; the place was in a strip mall with a sign that almost blended with the brick building. The windows looked to be those strange one-way windows.

Except, as Roman saw when he walked in, they weren't. The place was just dim inside. A glance to either side showed it was a straight path to the counter lined with boxes and cages for various odd pets with an extra aisle on the right, likely lined with more pets. The cages were pretty bare bones-especially for the tarantulas-probably so that customers could personalize them once they were bought. 

One cage in particular caught his eye. It was a glass cage on top of the left set, completely empty save for its five-foot long snake. Bright yellow on top and black on its stomach, it was the most striking snake Roman had ever seen. But that wasn’t why it caught his eye so quickly.

The snake had a metal chain around its neck and looped around other parts of its body, forcing it to stay curled up. 

“Looking at that guy?” a sudden voice behind him called. Roman almost injured his neck with how fast he looked at the counter. The cashier was a tan guy with black hair in a black tank top and an equally black scarf. He had the head of a stag tattooed on his left shoulder. Roman couldn’t place why, but he got the feeling this man shouldn’t be in charge of animals. The man smiled as he continued. “Careful with him, he’s a devious one.”

Roman looked back towards the snake, who wasn’t moving. The snake stared at the side of the cage blankly.

He looked back to the cashier. “How much is he?”

“Him?” The cashier laughed a bit. “Twenty if you’re  **really** considering it.”

Roman didn’t need to glance back at the cage to make his decision. This snake was getting out of here today. “I certainly am.” He pulled out his wallet. For a moment, he considered paying in cash, but decided a card would be better. Proof this was where he got the snake in case something went wrong and animal control needed to get involved.

The man’s grin got wider, like a devil making a contract with someone with some mighty fine print. “No refunds. You sure you want  **that** one?” 

Roman nodded with vigor. “Of course.” Deal with a devil or not, Roman was going to rescue this poor snake. He walked over and handed his card over.

As he walked over, the feeling of distrust got worse. Something was very off with this man. Something was horribly  _ wrong _ with this man. Roman didn’t know what it was, but it was terrifying. Something about this guy made the hair on his neck stand up. It felt like something horrible was going to happen.

“Alright,” the man said, taking the card to swipe it. The moment he took the card, something made Roman’s heart stop. His instincts told him to get out of there when he got his card and receipt back. 

When he stepped out from behind the counter with a bag and a snake rod, Roman noticed the guy wore equally black sweats and tennis shoes. This guy rivaled Virgil in how much black he wore. He took the top of the cage off and used the rod to dump the poor snake into the bag. For some reason, it didn’t hiss. The cashier turned to Roman, offering him the bag with a knowing grin. “Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.”

Roman grabbed his scaley new friend and sped-walked out of the store to his care. That bad feeling went away.

He sped the whole way home, nearly running a few stop signs. Roman had the snake on the passenger seat the entire way, and when he got home, the first thing he did was dig through the garage for bolt cutters he’d gotten to keep from a set. He set the snake down on his table and gently pulled him out. Now he also noticed the snake had tape on his mouth. 

The snake didn’t moved as he cut the first part of a weak link. Nor did the snake move as Roman cut the rest of it. He pulled the chain off the snake’s neck with no resistance. From there, he was able to unwind the rest, and then pull the tape off. 

At first, nothing. Roman picked up the snake, hoping he hadn’t died. And then the snake curled up a bit in his hands. The yellow noodle proceeded to slowly coil himself around Roman’s arm.

Now Roman could see just how bad it was. The snake had what looked like an indentation all around his neck, and the tops of his vertebrae were showing underneath those yellow scales. He stuck the end of his face up Roman’s sleeve. He felt so cold and light. If the snake was this starved and hurt, how many other problems could he have that Roman didn’t know about? 

He had to be examined by a vet. With the arm not taken by a cold snake, Roman picked up his phone and dialed the nearest one. 

A sweet, “Hello,” answered after two rings. “Visionary Pet Care. What do you need?”

“Hello, this is Roman Sanders. I bought a snake today that I think had an ingrown metal collar and looks starved. It wouldn’t move until I picked it up, where I noticed it was cold, and now it’s weakly curled around my arm.” 

Roman would’ve asked, but the person on the phone didn’t let him. “Bring your snake in immediately, sir. We need to know how bad it is.”

“I’ll be there shortly.” He hung up and reluctantly removed the snake from his arm. He didn’t want his new baby to suffer the cold, but Roman knew he couldn’t drive properly with a snake attached to him. So back into the bag the snake went. 

As compensation, he turned the seat heater on low for his precious scaley passenger on the way to the vet.

Once at the vet, they led him right to a room where they had a heating rock set up. Roman placed his poor snake on the rock as soon as he entered, and the noodle gratefully curled up on the nice warm plastic. The vet was there within the minute. 

Her mouth almost dropped at the sight. She stepped over and lifted up the snake’s head, who parted his jaws in a faint hiss. The vet murmured some reassurance as the snake calmed down. She lifted his head up more and gave him a quick once over. “This guy’s either a boa constrictor or a large ball python, but I’m willing to bet a boa.”

Then she looked to Roman. “I’d like to keep him for a least a few days, run some tests on him, make sure he doesn’t have any parasites or mites.”

“Of course.” He gave a nod.

She let go of the snake, who coiled back up on the warm rock. “What name should I put him under?”

Right, his snake needed a name. Roman glanced at the snake. Name, name. Suddenly, one popped into his head. It just felt right. “Lyle,” he said as he looked back to the vet.


End file.
